I fully admit that by now I am a sex toy skeptic. Thereâs only so many times you can see something declared ârevolutionaryâ before you just roll your eyes and toss it in the pile with other disappointments that made the same claim.
Thatâs why I have to be honest and say that I had the Evi Kegel Exerciser by Aneros for a while before I decided to bust it out and give it a try. Check out the picture and you can see why. What the heck was this thing? It was promising âhands free pleasureâ by hitting the g-spot and clitoris simultaneously and all you need is a swivel of your hips? Oh, and itâs a kegel exerciser too? Riiiight.
I would now like to express my sincerest apologies to the lovely folks at Aneros for doubting their claims. There. I said it. Evi rocked my world.
I wasnât planning on testing Evi today. Itâs been a stressful week and I was cleaning up my toy cupboard when I saw its beautiful red and white box. It had been sitting there glaring accusingly at me for weeks and I finally succumbed to the guilt of neglecting it for so long. With Evi in one hand and some Aneros Sessions Lube in the other, I trudged to my bedroom to see what the fuss was about. I admit to some eye rolling on the way.
First, let me explain that Evi is not a small thing. You can see how it sits in the palm of my hand and I am fully admitting that I have pretty big hands for a woman. Man hands, in fact. I can barely close my palm over the bulbous end. Itâs not gigantic by any means, at 5 inches (12.5 cm) around at its most bulbous point but you are meant to know that itâs in you. Thatâs the point.
The prong (terrible word but what else would you call it?) at the other end faces up so that when you put the device inside you, it is pointing up from your vaginal entrance towards your clitoris. Itâs 3 Âź inches (or 8.5 cm) long and is rigid beneath the silky smooth silicone that covers the entire device.
So, hereâs how it works. Or at least how it worked for me.
Aneros advises you lay down somewhere and tilt your hips up to insert so I put some lube on the tip and gently inserted the bulbous end into my vagina. So far, so good. It was really easy to insert even though I was completely not in the mood. I was figuring that I would test it out for its kegel properties, be completely put off and call it a day. Yeah, not so much.
As far as a kegel exerciser goes, itâs okay, I guess. Its size and shape means that you really donât have to do much to keep it in and the stem isnât much to clench around. For a beginner to kegels, I would say that itâs a fine beginner tool. I clenched, I stood up and walked around. I even shimmied a little and bounced. It stayed put but I didnât really feel like I had to clench tightly to keep it in. The outer stem is kind of an anchor that way.
So far, I was pleasantly surprised. I honestly expected something about this device to hit me the wrong way or poke in the wrong places, but it felt totally comfortable. Somewhat heartened, I moved on to step 2 â sexy times.
I lay down on the bed and thought about it for a second. Honestly, I could barely feel it was there. The manual says to slowly thrust your hips up with your feet planted on the bed. Ooh, now we were getting somewhere. It was definitely rubbing my g-spot and it felt nice â like using a g-spot dildo but without having to do the thrusting manually. Wait a minute! Isnât that what Eviâs packaging actually said? Eureka!
Was it hitting my clitoris? Not so much. It was actually falling just a couple of millimetres shy but thatâs just my anatomy. I seem to often have issues with things that are âone size fits allâ in the sex toy department. Itâs my lot in life whether itâs sex toys, clothes, or cute hats. I am pretty used to it by now, being a tall and large woman.
What to do? In a stroke of genius, I decided to sit on the edge of my bed with my feet on the floor. Bingo! The added pressure of sitting with Evi inside not only gave the clitoral stimulator that extra few millimetres to actually reach my clitoris but put more pressure of the bulb on my g-spot. By rocking slowly, I was getting somewhere⌠fast. The orgasm I had was absolutely knee shakingly good. My g-spot was one happy camper and I admit to having to lay back down for a bit to catch my breath.
So, now I am writing this review with a quite unexpected smile on my face. I love it when Iâm pleasantly surprised by a new toy. Will you get the same results? I wish I could say, although even if Evi doesnât rock your world, it would still make a good beginner kegel exerciser. What I can say is that they have obviously put some time and care and tons of research into this device. After all, Aneros is known for their amazing prostate play toys so it only makes sense that they would bring that level of dedication to their first product meant exclusively for women.
My recommendation? If youâre feeling like trying something totally new and youâre willing to take some time and exert some patience, Evi may be just the thing for you. I can honestly say, much to my own surprise, that this toy is going into my very own box of favorite toys that never leaves my bedside.
