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Safe Size Play – How to Use Bigger Toys Safely

Do you love a challenge? Does the thought of being stretched and filled give you a little thrill inside but you don’t know where to start? Size play means different things to different people and every body is different, but there are some good universal guidelines that Betty recommends to get you started on your size play journey.

What is size play with sex toys?

Size play, when it comes to sex toys, is wanting to be penetrated with a toy longer and/or thicker than average, whether anally or vaginally. For some, this can reach extremes with dildos of 12+ inches. For others, it means 8 or 9 inches.

Why do people want to experience size play?

There is no one answer to this question because every person is different. For some, the thought of being penetrated or ‘filled up’ with a sex toy that is long or thick is something they find arousing. For others, it is the feeling of fullness they love.

Will size play stretch out or damage my vagina or anus permanently?

When it comes to the vagina, there is a tremendous amount of elasticity involved, which is why vaginas return to their original size after childbirth. Experimenting with larger sizes is not going to permanently loosen up the vagina but small tears in the tissue can happen if you are not cautious and relaxed when attempting to stretch around a larger size.

Vaginas do have a limited amount of insertion capacity in terms of depth. The average vagina is 2 – 4 inches long and can become 4 – 8 inches long when turned on, but you will be hitting the cervix if you over-insert.

While anal sex is generally not permanently damaging, when dealing with size play, extreme stretching can over time lead to a loosening of the anal sphincter (the muscle that keeps the poop in). Keep in mind that we are talking about extreme stretching here.

Like the vagina, there is always a threat of tearing when using large toys anally but the biggest danger for anal penetration is using toys with no stopper or flared base to prevent over-insertion. Unlike the vagina, there is no real limit to how far an anal toy can be inserted. Case in point, a 31-year-old Italian man who managed to over-insert a 23-inch dildo into his rectum, causing doctors to invent a lasso-like device to extract it. True story.

How Do I Choose a Larger Toy for Size Play?

  1. DO NOT start with an extremely large toy. Size play takes time and patience to work up to something very large. Starting too big can lead to pain and frustration.
  2. Put some thought into what you have experienced in the past that was comfortable for you, then size up about an inch with your first toy.
  3. Read the product descriptions carefully to make sure you are comfortable with the length and width of the toy you are purchasing.
  4. For anal play, make sure there is a flared base or some other shape that will prevent over-insertion (i.e., A dildo with balls)
  5. Look for toys that have some give and flexibility to them. Items that are dual density or made of flexible materials will be more comfortable to insert.
  6. Check your toy’s materials. Extremely large dildos are often made of materials like PVC and TPE which are porous and need a lot of extra time and attention to keep clean
  7. A great quality lubricant is as important as the toy you choose both for anal and vaginal play. Look for thick, cushioned lubricants that are long lasting. Some of Betty’s favorites include:

Wicked Anal Jelle Water Based Lubricant

Sensuva Ultra Thick Water/Silicone Blend Personal Lubricant

Pjur Backdoor Glide Silicone Anal Lubricant (not compatible with silicone toys)

Tips for Getting Started

  • Clean your toy thoroughly with soap and warm water before using it.
  • Consider an anal douche if you are doing deeper anal penetration, to help avoid any mess.
  • Start with foreplay and get completely relaxed before attempting any penetration
  • Use A LOT of good quality lubricant and keep it handy to reapply as you go.
  • Experiment with a comfortable position. We recommend laying on your back with a cushion under your hips, legs raised and spread, or squatting over the toy and bearing down on it.
  • Listen to your body every step of the way and stop if you feel any discomfort or pain
  • We recommend inserting the toy yourself rather than allowing your partner to do it, particularly the first time. This will allow you complete control over the experience.
  • If you are using a toy with a partner, communicate before, during, and after how you are feeling and how much you feel you can take.

Betty’s Recommended Products for Size Play

Soft & Realistic Silicone – Vixen Creations Realistic Silicone Dildos

Made of high-quality silicone, these are dual density with a firmer inner core and softer outside, making them ultra-realistic in feel. The largest dildos in the line are The Vixen Outlaw at 9.5 inches and The Vixen Gambler at 11.5 inches.


Soft and Realistic Non-Silicone – Au Naturel Sensa Feel Dual Density Dildos

These dildos come in a range of sizes, shapes, and flesh tones plus they are very affordable so you can work your way up through the sizes. They have a firm but flexible inner core and a soft outside, making them extremely comfortable to use.

Semi Firm Silicone – Colours Pleasures Silicone Dildos

This line of ultra realistic and colorful dildos starts at 5 inches and goes all the way up to 10 insertable inches. The body safe silicone is flexible but not squishy and is compatible with both water based and pure silicone lubricants.

Semi Firm and Bendable Silicone – Fleshstixxx Realistic Silicone Dildos

These silicone dildos are thermo reactive which means you can heat them up gently in warm water and they become more pliable and softer. Similarly, you can cool them for added firmness. They have a good selection of realistic skin tones and designs to choose from that are 8 inches and up as well.

Absolute Extremes – the Biggest You Can Get



Dick Rambone Porn Star 16.7-inch Dildo

This monster dildo with the heavily veined shaft will fill users an amazing fifteen inches deep. This dildo is almost 4 pounds and about the size of a human forearm, so buyer beware.



Dr Skin Dr Chubbs 10 Inch Dildo

Girth girth girth! Dr. Chubbs has an unbelievable 3 inches in width, or almost 9.5 inches of girth! With almost 7 inches of insertable length, this is a dildo for the penetration expert.



Au Naturel Big Daddy 14 Inch Sensa Feel Dildo

Available in chocolate and vanilla tones, these are soft and squishy on the outside with a firm but flexible core for amazing comfort. You get 11.5 inches of insertable length, and these daddies weigh in at almost 2 pounds.



King Cock 15 Inch Suction Cup Dildo with Balls

With 13.5 inches of insertable length and over 9 inches of girth, you can see why this called the King. This dildo is ultra-realistic looking and weights over 2 pounds.


Shop Betty's extensive collection of large dildos by clicking on the image below. 

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