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Bettys Toy Box is a women-owned, family run sex-positive boutique where pleasure meets confidence, offering body-safe toys, real advice, and a playful space to explore what feels good.

Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski

Original price $22.00 - Original price $22.00
Original price
$22.00
$22.00 - $22.00
Current price $22.00

The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life

What if the key to a more satisfying sex life isn't changing your body, your relationship, or your desire—but understanding how sexuality actually works? In this revised and updated edition of the groundbreaking bestseller Come As You Are, renowned sex educator and researcher Dr. Emily Nagoski challenges outdated myths about women's sexuality and replaces them with evidence-based insights that are both empowering and transformative.

Drawing on the latest research in sexual health, desire, pleasure, mindfulness, and emotional wellbeing, Nagoski explains why factors such as stress, mood, trust, and body image play a crucial role in sexual satisfaction. Through engaging stories, practical examples, and accessible science, she helps readers better understand their unique sexual responses and embrace themselves without shame or judgment.

Whether you're looking to improve intimacy, navigate changes in desire, or simply gain a deeper understanding of sexual wellness, Come As You Are offers compassionate guidance and life-changing knowledge. This updated edition continues to inspire readers around the world to cultivate greater confidence, connection, and pleasure by recognizing that they are already sexually whole—exactly as they are.

Why You'll Love It

  • Updated with the latest research on desire, pleasure, and mindfulness
  • Challenges common myths about women's sexuality with science-backed insights
  • Helps improve sexual confidence, self-acceptance, and relationship satisfaction
  • Explores the impact of stress, emotions, body image, and trust on sexual wellbeing
  • Written in an approachable, engaging style that makes complex topics easy to understand
  • An empowering resource for anyone interested in sexual health and personal growth
  • International bestselling book by award-winning sex educator and researcher Dr. Emily Nagoski

Don't forget to pick up The Come As You Are Workbook: A Practical Guide to the Science of Sex

About the Author

Emily Nagoski is the award-winning author of the New York Times bestseller Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life, and the coauthor ofBurnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle. She has an MS in counseling and a PhD in health behavior, both from Indiana University.

Review

“This is the best book I have ever read about sexual desire and why some couples just stop having sex, and what they can do about it. Come As You Are is an absolutely necessary guide for all couples who want to understand the ups and downs in their own sex life. It is a must read!”
—John Gottman, Ph.D., author of 
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

“Emily Nagoski has written one of the most important books about sex any woman (or anybody else) could ever pick up, full of insights that are both fascinating and deeply useful. Synthesizing new research and theory about sexuality with old-school sex-positive information of the sort you didn’t learn in sex ed (unless, perhaps, you are a Unitarian, or Scandinavian, or lucky enough to be in Dr. Nagoski’s class), I guarantee 
Come As You Are will open minds and change lives.”
— Carol Queen, Ph.D., Founding director, Center for Sex & Culture

“Emily Nagoski is worth her weight in TED Talks, and 
Come as You Are is a master-class in the science of sex.”
— Ian Kerner, sex therapist and bestselling author of 
She Comes First

“It’s the science of sex, decoded and demystified. Want to be educated on the latest findings about female genitalia? Of course you do. Empowering and sex-positive at best, this informative read makes for an enticing bedfellow.”
—Refinery29

“Lots of books — and articles and experts — claim to have the keys to transform your sex life. This one actually has it. It isn’t as fast as taking a pill, but it will last a whole lot longer. You will find no hot new bedroom moves — it’s that deeper-level soul stuff. You know, the stuff that actually works.”
—Salon.com

“Wonderful new language to help us articulate to women (and their lovers) what is going on.”
Huffington Post

“Like a punch to the gut. When I read the passage that made me realize—after all these years—that I was not actually broken, I began to cry. . . . I wished [Nagoski] was someone who was actively in my life, someone I could reach out to for grounding every time I momentarily forgot the lessons in her book.”
—Book Riot

“Nagoski’s book deserves plaudits for the rare achievement of merging pop science and the sexual self-help genre in prose that’s not insufferably twee. . . . [
Come As You Are] offers up hard facts on the science of arousal and desire in a friendly and accessible way.”
The Guardian (UK)

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For a complete guide on toy care and storage, read
How to Clean, Care For, and Store Your Pleasure Products

Make sure to clean your pleasure product after each use to avoid harboring any bacteria.

Dildos/Vibrators/Anal Toys/Toys with electronics: 

  • Clean your toy with mild soap and warm water, making sure to get into every seam.
  • Do not fully submerge unless the toy is waterproof
  • For non-waterproof, spot clean with a damp cloth. 
  • Use a spray toy cleaner for non-waterproof toys or to give your toy a quick clean. 

Stroker Sleeves

  • Remove from the outer casing and thoroughly rinsed with warm soapy water after each use
  • If your stroker sleeve feels tacky after cleaning, dry thoroughly then add a small amount of pure cornstarch or Renewal Powder - FOUND HERE

Harnesses/Straps

  • Spot clean with a damp cloth

FOR SPOT CLEANING, USE A DEDICATED TOY CLEANER - FOUND HERE

Always dry completely with a lint-free towel before storing, and keep toys in a clean, dry place away from direct sunlight or dust.



Sex toys come in an astounding array of materials, and we at Betty's want you to know exactly what you are putting in, around, and on your body.

That is why we have created this comprehensive Guide to Sex Toy Materials to help you make the best choice for your body.